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Friday, July 31, 2009

Jones Soda Pineapple Cream

I've been doing some acquisition lately, keeping my thumb on the pulse of Weirdness, my eyes peeled for that unusual label on a high shelf. The donation of the Chin Chin Grass Jelly horror has galvanized me into seeking out more good stuff. Unfortunately, I haven't found anything to even come close to matching that can of insanity, but I've got some of the somewhat less-common brands in line for a quaffing. Yesyerday, I went to the fridge, meaning to assess our current holdings and make a few decisions.
There, in the door of the fridge, was a bright yellow bottle of Jones Pineapple Cream soda.
I don't remember buying it.
The Kibbitzer-in-Chief assures me that she didn't buy it.
It wasn't there the other day.

"My dear," quoth I, "unto us the gods have given a soda."
"That can't be good," quoth she.

I am assuming that the Mysterious Stranger has not taken to sneaking into my house at night and planting soda in my fridge. It may be that, as I perused the aisles of a shop somewhere, this soda crept into my cart unbeknownst to me on insect-like legs which now lie hidden, drawn up beneath the exoskeleton-like label. Or perhaps I bought it, but my memory has been modified by nefarious aliens or Men in Black.
Or maybe I am a seriously absent-minded doofus.

In any case, today we're trying some Jones Pineapple Cream (or, as the label helpfully translates, Jones Crema de Piña).

Where and when: Probably purchased July 2009, but I honestly can't remember doing so, or where it came from.
Color: bright yellow, with a hint of green. Very similar to fluorescent highlighter.
Scent: PiƱa colada-ish. Ever so slightly bitter, but 98% sweet.
Taste: The pineapple taste is fairly accurate, reminiscent of very ripe fresh pineapple, but without the tartness. Very sweet, like most of the Jones line. The cream is a pleasant, not-particularly-vanilla cream, light. Tastes like coconut or bubble gum. This is, effectively, a pretty good piña colada soda.

The cream takes dominance a few seconds after the initial taste, and then just kind of sits there. I feel no unexplained impulses to drink more, or to go out and buy more. I'm keeping a close eye on the fridge from now on, though.

Quaff rating: 3.0. Pleasant enough.
Cough rating: 0.5, stickily sweet.


  1. I must find this... it sounds like the closest thing you can find to a Dole Whip outside of Hawaii, or a Disney theme park! The search is on! BTW, great site! People need to be a bit more brave when it comes to trying new sodas.

  2. I can't say I've ever had a Dole Whip. If I do, I'll be sure to post about it here. And thanks for visiting; I've been greatly enjoying reading your site. Excellent stuff!


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