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Monday, December 28, 2009

Spirit of Koiwai "Kirin" Yogurt Taste

You know, the Weird Soda Quest is inherently masochistic. We go out, find the strangest stuff we can, drink it, and if it's particularly unusual, we count that as a Good Thing. (Note that "unusual" does not inherently imply "unusually good"). Thus, it makes a sort of sad, twisted sense that, while out at Mitsuwa, when I beheld Spirit of Koiwai "Kirin" Yogurt Taste on the rack before me, the internal conversation went something like this.

Me: "Oh my God. A Japanese yogurt soda-like thing. I didn't know they had yogurt soda-like drinks in Japan. Isn't lactose intolerance more common there? Why would they subject themselves to such a thing?"

Me: "You know what sorts of Weird drinks they have in Japan. This isn't all that strange in comparison."

Me: "True. But think of the other yogurt sodas we've had. Those were unbelievably foul."

Me: "Some of the commenters say they're good after trying more. They're probably an acquired taste. Maybe you should try this one, and expand your horizons. Plus, look at the ingredients. This has sugar. And remember your mission. It's all for the mission! You must not fear."

Me: "Hmm. I suppose you're right. It's certainly Weird. Your arguments are compelling. Come, let us purchase and quaff it with joyous abandon. And if copious vomiting should follow, then we shall wear the splatters as badges of pride."

GALT: YOU #$*&@ING NUMBSKULL.

So now I see before me a bottle of Spirit of Koiwai "Kirin" Yogurt Taste. According to the ingredients list, it does indeed contain sugar. And soybean polysaccharides. And milk powder. And lactic calcium acidulant. I think I'm going to quaff it.

GALT: NO! NOOO! G%$@#$&!MIT, NO! SOMEONE STOP HIM!

Where: purchased at Mitsuwa Marketplace
Color: Thinner than the Abali--resembles watered-down skim milk. Slightly translucent, white.
JAT: "Kind of dark white."
LAT: "Creamy."

Scent: Sweet smelling, with the milkiness definitely present. Smells like sweet fruit yogurt.
LAT: "Kind of smells like cherry yogurt soda"
JAT: "Yeah, kind of. It kind of stays in your nose."

Taste: Not bad at all. Tastes almost exactly like fruit yogurt, but thinner, like very thin milk.
LAT: "Peachy!"
JAT: "Yeah!"
They're right. It does taste almost exactly like peach yogurt. Almost none of the lactic acid taste--very little acid at all. Not carbonated at all.
The lead and junior assistant tasters like it a lot. They're currently chanting "Yummy...yummy...yummy..." and smacking their lips.

My horizons have indeed been expanded, although this "yogurt drink" is so utterly unlike the previous yogurt sodas as to be completely different beverages. Actually, this is almost too sweet, but in small doses it's quite pleasant.
The main differences between this and the Abali are the presence of sugar, the lower viscosity, the lack of acid, and the lack of carbonation. I'm pretty sure that carbonation and thickness are not the problem, and while I like sweet drinks, I'm not inherently afraid of those which are not. It must be the acid taste--that horrible "already digested stomach contents" taste--which makes the other yogurt sodas so much worse.

GALT: YOU DODGED A %@#$ING BULLET WITH THIS ONE, QUAFFMASTER. DON'T %@$$#ING EVER DO THIS TO ME EVER AGAIN.

Quaff rating: 3.5. Very nice, if slightly too sweet.
Cough rating: 1.0. The milkiness is still off-putting to me, but not really bad.

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