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Sunday, June 12, 2011

"Day" of Coconut #3: Goya Coconut Soda

We continue in our voyage through the seas of Coconut Weirdness today with a quaffing of Goya's Coconut Soda. This comes to us in an attractive green bottle, with an appealing picture of a coconut. It also bears the sobering and stark warning "ARTIFICIAL FLAVORS". This is interesting; most sodas boldly claim "No artificial flavors!", or humbly admit "Natural and artificial flavors" (while averting their eyes and mumbling like an embarrassed adolescent). This one say "Yeah, my flavors are artificial. All of them. Every single one a proud product of human-supervised synthetic chemistry. I'm post modern, baby, a techno-thriller that'll assimilate your taste buds."

A green bottle of synthetic goodness.
This soda is proud of its heritage in a vat somewhere in New Jersey.
Or maybe not; there is no ingredient label or nutritional info present. I have no idea what this contains. It might never have been close to a coconut. It might conceivably contain axle grease. Or powdered hummingbird. Or swarms of nanobots which will restructure my intestines into a 1:100 scale model of Notre Dame.
But does it taste like coconut?

Where and when: Given to me by ChopChop in March 2011.
Color: Completely transparent, no color.
Scent: Very faint. I suspect it's supposed to smell like coconut meat, but it doesn't quite. It's got a sharp, kind of acrid feel high in the nose. Sweet undertone.
K-i-C: *grimace* "Stinky."

Taste: The initial taste is sweet, but with an odd acid background. The taste of shredded sweetened coconut meat is clear. It's also somewhat reminiscent of cotton candy.
K-i-C: "Tastes fine. Doesn't have much of a flavor at all, actually. I just taste sugar and carbonation."
This surprises me.I wouldn't have guessed that this would please the Kibbitzer, given her dislike of coconut and soda. Perhaps she has become too jaded.
It's much more like a typical soda than the Amy and Brian juices, both because it is carbonated and because of the much stronger sweetness.
A larger sip produces a stronger acid/tart feel, which is not a good thing.
Wyvern: "Even less pumpkin-y." (than the other two juice-based ones)

Quaff rating: Fairly tasty, if a bit tart. 3.0
Cough rating: Nothing too terrible. 0.5.

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