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Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Prometheus Springs Lemon Ginger Capsaicin Spiced Elixir

This morning, a dear friend of the Lab (who has been introduced before as Pepper Trot) came by. She and her son were coming to take Olorin out for a day at the beach, which is good--he should occasionally have a break from his 18-hour-a-day job analyzing bottle mold and making painstaking woodcut illustrations for his book "Weirde Sodas of 1775: A Compendium of Heresie Amongst Beverage-kind". To me great delight, she had also brought something new. And by "new", I mean "which I would never have thought of, and whose existence strikes me as ill-advised". She produced a bottle of Snapple-ish size and shape, which was labeled "Lemon Ginger". thing seems quite protective of this stuff.

Well, those are nice flavors. This should be

"Capsaicin-spiced elixir"?

Allow me to quote from the label.

"Capsaicin: Nature's Spicy Superfood. Extracted from chili peppers, this antioxidant is delightfully painful. Its kick has the curious ability to trigger endorphins for a happy, natural high."


"Awaken your senses with refreshing lemon layered over a cold-pressed ginger bite. This robust elixir is for intrepid individuals who seek a more potent ginger experience."

I feel it is worth noting that this is the only Weird beverage I've had so far which is actually promising to hurt me when I drink it. I am also keenly aware that Prometheus was a titan, best known for bringing fire to mortals.

I am so happy right now.

Where and when: apparently, according to Pepper, this was purchased at Jimbos, or maybe Whole Foods.
Color: Pale, cloudy, ever-so-slightly yellow tinged.  
Scent: Hmm. Actually, kind of like Thai food.

Kibbitzer: "If you had a peanut-butter sandwich next to it."

I wonder if you mixed this with one of the peanut sodas if you would get Pad Thai?

The lemon and ginger are clearly present, and there's definitely a threat of burning.

Taste: Oh my God.
Let me provide a rough timeline.
(t=0 s) Major lemon impact, mild to moderate sweetness. Powerfully tart.
(t=0.05 s) There's the ginger. So far, so good. Actually, kind of nice.
(t=0.1 s) So far, reminiscent of lemon ginger cookies, which I like a lot. This isn't so bad.
(t=0.3 s) Hmm. That's kind of an interesting edge. A bit spicy.
(t=0.4 s) Okay, some spice building up.
(t=0.5 s) I write this in the hopes that it may be found by those in a position to warn others of my fate. For more than 400 milliseconds, I thought I had found something pleasantly lemony and gingerish. Ah, to be young and foolish once more.

I will openly admit that I am a spiciness wuss. When I go eat Indian or Thai, I never go over 2 (on a scale of 1-10). That being said, my eyes opened wide, and I was only able to make vague strangled noises for a moment. To a wuss like me, it's pretty potent stuff.

Kibbitzer: *pause, contemplation, nodding to self* "Actually, it's pretty good."

Punctilius: "Maybe it would be good for arthritis of the throat."

Kibbitzer: "It's very...warming."

That's the funny thing--it is actually pretty good. The capsaicin interacts in a nice way with the ginger, making it significantly more potent. The lemon plays nicely, and it's nicely sweetened.  I was prepared to really dislike this, and I doubt I'd seek it out, since I'm not actually very fond of spicy food, but it's pretty pleasant.

Quaff rating: 3.5. Quite nice, and definitely interesting.
Cough rating: 1.0. A kick in the pants.


  1. I found this drink 2-years ago at Chucks grocery (A wannabe Whole foods that actually sucks) it answered my question to as why I felt so damn good when I and a whole Vancouveria, WA. Russian community took cayanne pepper powder we felt so good....the endorphen releasing effect.

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  3. I read you revue of Goya gold love the line about the yellow lensed swimming goggles. I stopped a the Goya que because I was hopping to read a revue about their ginger beer which also is spiked with capsicum. It sold so infrequently in stores that I had to go to a wholesaler to buy a case Not one employee ever tried the stuff I might as well asked if they ever tried hooligan oil on their rice. Its a blast but you my dear reviewer have too many taste buds to enjoy it. I had a girl friend who had so many taste buds that green beans where her point of departure. I would say that I have such a broad palate that I draw the line at Chines beef with pickled vegetables.

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